The Extreme Male Pursuer Is Not Attractive to Women


Met this guy about three months ago (not a Christian). Had known him two years via Facebook. He is single, age appropriate, cultured, kind, is an only child like me, both parents dead, owns gorgeous house and a waterfall ( a small one!)  and seemed to be chasing me. He doesn't drive and lives miles away. I don't think he has had many girlfriends. Not long-term anyway.

I don’t fancy him at all. AT ALL. I also decided, over the weeks I got to know him that there’s something a bit amiss with him emotionally too. Hard to explain but once you get to know him you see it.

I have honed my powers of discrimination/judgement over the last four years. I used to be an awful judge but now I think I am a good judge of character. Practice makes perfect!

I am not used to being pursued. At first it was pleasant and we have had some nice times out – as friends. I made it abundantly clear that I am not interested in a relationship (not with him, anyway!) and even that I am celibate by choice.

But he kept pressing for us to meet up. No opportunity went by when he did not talk of us meeting again at my place, going out to theatre, blah-de-blah, all under the guise of friendship. But it did not feel like that. I began to feel a bit… hunted. I think I felt sorry for him and that made me overlook a few comments. I also felt very strongly that he molded his opinions to fit with mine. What woman wants that, in a friend or a partner? He even echoed the words of my friend, A, to make them sound like his own ideas. Creepy.

I did not necessarily want to lose his friendship ‘cos he is good company and seeing him  from time to time has been pleasant but it all came to a head this week. One text too much. I just had to tell him to give me “some space”. IOW, stop pestering me!

What a pain! And what a disappointment. But the Extreme Male Pursuer, as Dr Bonnie calls this kind of man, is an anathema to most woman.

I could not respect him cos he doesn’t respect himself.